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+---
+title: Am I transgender?
+x-toc-enable: true
+...
+
+Introduction
+============
+
+This is actually a really difficult question to answer. Only you can
+know. We plan to later add a bunch of info here about how other people
+realize they're trans, and links to stories about people's
+experiences, which may help. For now, this section is more or less
+empty.
+
+Someone did make this site, which might be useful to you: (it's not a
+questionnaire): <http://amitransgender.com/>
+
+Here is [a map of gender-diverse
+cultures](http://www.pbs.org/independentlens/content/two-spirits_map-html/).
+
+[Yes, you are 'trans enough' to be
+transgender!](http://www.pbs.org/independentlens/content/two-spirits_map-html/)
+
+No, really.
+[You are trans enough to be trans!](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/mia-violet/yes-youre-trans-enough-to_b_9318754.html)
+
+NOTE: If you find questionnaires online, please remember that they are
+all BULLSHIT. OK?
+
+**IT'S OK TO BE TRANS!**
+
+Don't feel like a woman or a man? Do you feel like you are neither or both, or that you switch between them, etc?
+------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+You could be *non-binary*. We have information about this scattered
+throughout the website.
+
+[3 Simple Steps to Recognizing the Existence of Non-Binary
+People](http://everydayfeminism.com/2016/11/recognizing-non-binary-people/)
+
+Are you intersex?
+-----------------
+
+Intersex people can also be trans. Remember, being trans simply means
+that you disagree with or do not fully agree with your assigned birth
+gender.
+
+Reading material
+----------------
+
+There are some books on the topic, which may help you. Note that some of
+them only cover particular types of trans people, e.g. only trans women.
+
+### Whipping Girl
+
+This is a very good book, and is often used in Gender Studies courses at
+universities these days.
+
+### Gender Outlaw
+
+Another good book.
+
+You can probably find these books on Amazon or something, or at your
+local library maybe. Or\... on some other place on the internet,
+perhaps. E.g. eBook.
+
+### The Null HypotheCis
+
+An article on the web, which may be useful for those who are still questioning:
+
+[The Null HypotheCis](https://freethoughtblogs.com/nataliereed/2012/04/17/the-null-hypothecis/)
+
+You might be asking questions like\....
+
+How did I not know?
+-------------------
+
+In short, you are a victim of an extreme form of propaganda and
+brainwashing that enforces belief in what we call the *gender binary*.
+This is the idea that there are only 2 genders (male and female) and
+that there is no variation between them or that people can't switch
+between them. You probably weren't taught about transgender issues in
+school at all, and nobody in your family or social group told you about
+it. You may have simply stumbled on it by accident and realized that it
+answered all of your questions; before now, you knew you were
+*different* but you didn't know why.
+
+You were born, and you were told you were &lt;insert gender&gt;. You
+were then given toys, friends and a social upbringing in that gender
+that the doctor chose for you.
+
+The doctor decided your gender based on your genitalia. This is a common
+- and wrong - practise.
+
+Society taught you that only men and women exist. It probably didn't
+teach you about the existence of non-binary people (if you came out to
+yourself as non-binary, for instance).
+
+You were taught to live as a man, or to live as a woman.
+
+You felt weird. You felt different. You were unhappy, and you didn't
+know why. It may have been mild enough that you were able to ignore it.
+
+*You may have been aware at a younger age, but your brain suppressed it.
+When the brain detects danger, it shuts itself down to protect you from
+harm. Your gender was incompatible with your body, and you suppressed
+it.*
+
+You were repressed. You never learned about gender dysphoria (or gender
+euphoria) at school. Your school probably only taught you that men are
+men, women are women and that they make babies.
+
+A world was pulled over your eyes, which you did not belong in, but you
+were able to cope.
+
+Until now.
+
+[This article explains the problem in a lot more
+detail](http://www.tranarchism.com/2010/11/26/not-your-moms-trans-101/)
+- from birth, you were forced (yes, forced) to fit into a certain binary
+gender, probably based on your genitalia. If you were unlucky, the
+doctor might have seen that you were intersex with ambiguous genitalia
+and they might have decided to perform surgery on you to "fix" you (in
+other words, mutilate you).
+
+How can I be trans if I realized so late?
+-----------------------------------------
+
+Contrary to what you might have otherwise heard, most trans people
+actually don't realize they're trans until they're in their 20s, 30s
+or 40s or older. Some people realize when they're in their 70s.
+
+A few realize in teens. Some repress it, and others don't and then try
+to cope.
+
+Most people don't realize that they're trans before teenage years.
+
+There are all kinds of triggers that lead to a person realizing that
+they're trans.
+
+This can result in extreme euphoria, for some individuals, because for
+the first time in their life they finally understand their feelings and
+finally feel at peace knowing who they are.
+
+And then the adventure begins\...
+
+What if this is just a sexual fetish and I'm not actually trans?
+-----------------------------------------------------------------
+
+*Some* people in the community will wrongly tell you that getting
+aroused about your appearance means you're not trans. This is *false*.
+
+Gatekeepers sometimes use autogynephilia (loving of oneself as a woman)
+or autoandrophilia (love of oneself as a man)
+as an excuse to try and
+convince a trans person that they are not trans. Gatekeeping is
+transphobic by nature. (we are not currently aware of a term for
+non-binary people, so for now we'll use the term autophillia. the
+term skoliosexual also refers to attraction to non-binary people, so
+the term autoskoliosexual could be used).
+
+Being sexually attracted to yourself as a particular gender does not
+invalidate your existence as that gender. It's a common theme in
+sexuality, and it has zero relevance to your gender identity and/or
+expression. Just as there are some people who are not sexually attracted
+to anyone, not even themselves.
+
+Any sexual fetishes that you have are also fine. It's common for
+people to have
+sexual fetishes. There are a great many of them out there, and an
+entire internet dedicated to them ;)
+
+None of this has anything to do with your gender identity
+and/or expression. All it means is
+that you have a fetish, and/or you are attracted to yourself, and there is
+absolutely nothing wrong with that at all. The reality is that lots of people
+are just like you, but lots of people repress it because we don't yet live
+in an open-minded society that accepts diversity.
+
+There is something wrong with anyone who says anything different than the
+above, but there's nothing wrong with *you* at all.
+
+But I like men/women/both, am I not just gay/bi? Maybe I'm just sexually frustrated?
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+Actually, trans people can be heterosexual, gay or bi. It's totally fine!
+
+[Sexuality and gender identity/expression are NOT the same
+thing!](sexuality.md)
+
+What if I'm just autistic / have Asperger's syndrome / are neurologically diverse?
+----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+A lot of trans people when they are young start becoming unruly at
+school, misbehaving a lot and throwing tantrums, etc.
+
+A lot of trans people actually are autistic. A trans person can be
+autistic, just like a cis person. It isn't really anything special.
+
+It's possible to be autistic and still be trans.
+
+On the other hand, difficulty interacting with people and social anxiety
+and discomfort in public, shutting down etc, can be caused by dysphoria
+too.
+
+Many parents try to convince their child that they are just autistic and
+not trans, after their children come out. Parents: please don't. You
+might screw your kid up. Let them explore their identity, OK?
+
+But I don't have dysphoria. How can I be trans?
+----------------------------------------------
+
+Actually, this is OK. Not all trans people suffer gender dysphoria. Some
+people only have gender *euphoria*
+
+We have a [page documenting this](gender-euphoria.md).
+
+I've already been diagnosed as neurologically or functionally diverse. Am I still trans?
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+Trans people can have mental health conditions, just like cis people.
+Cis people do not have a monopoly on mental health conditions!
+
+People with schizophrenia are often accused of being delusional or
+possibly confused when they come out as trans. *This is disgusting.
+Schizophrenia has nothing to do with gender identity, nor does any other
+mental health issue, and being transgender is not a mental health
+condition!*
+
+And the classic question\...
+
+What if I'm not trans?
+-----------------------
+
+Cis people don't realize they're trans, because they're not trans. If
+you're *worried* that you might not be trans, then to be honest you
+probably are, but it's always good to question yourself and be sure.
+There is no rush to do anything, unless you want to or need to.
+
+If you find yourself questioning your gender and feel like the one the
+doctors assigned you is false, then you probably are.
+
+**Only you can know whether you're trans.**
+
+If you later find out that you're not trans, then it doesn't matter!
+TransChation is mostly reversible, despite what many people say.
+
+You might come out to yourself as binary trans (trans man or trans
+woman), and if you later discover that you're *not trans*, it could be
+alternatively that you are non-binary. It's actually very common for
+people to come out as trans man/woman, but then later realize that
+they're non-binary. This is OK!
+
+It's OK to explore yourself, really! You don't have to be trans! You
+don't have to be cis either! Just keep an open mind, and keep exploring
+your identity, your life and your place in the world. You will surely
+find the answers, but you have to dig deep into yourself.
+
+Part of coming out to yourself as trans is (in many cases) undoing a lot
+of psychological trauma suffered over the years, and undoing a lot of
+repression. You will likely be *tripping* over yourself, for many months
+or years.
+
+It can be scary to come out to oneself. For the first time in your life,
+you're being honest with yourself and truly exploring yourself. The
+best thing to do is to try to be calm. You'll be surprised what you
+find, when you really look inwards on yourself.
+